Express Smile Atlanta: A Comprehensive Analysis

It’s no question that Don’t Be Tardy is the best show on Bravo, perhaps even on all of television. I’m not 100% sure why it’s so great, but it is and I don’t question greatness.

Kim Zolciak (don’t forget the Biermann) wen’t from a broke down housewife living in a townhouse paid for by a married sugar daddy, with two different children from two different fathers to being a rich bitch living in a mansion with a hot NFL player who adores her and now has 6 kids with the same [adopted] father. I would even go as far to say that she is a modern day cinderella.


So like any good fan, I follow most of the Biermann’s on both Instagram and Snapchat and for the most part I enjoy it. Except for one major flaw –  EXPRESS SMILE ATLANTA.

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Now don’t get me wrong, as an influencer myself I completely understand using your social platforms to generate income. But the level at which Express Smile Atlanta inundates both my Snapchat and Instagram feeds is unjust. And it is only getting worse.

So my initial thinking was “Wow, this Express Smile Atlanta company must have a lot of money to pay the Biermanns. They post so frequently!” Then, one day it occurred to me that this “company” might be OWNED by the Beirmanns. Why else would they post so fucking much about a product that 100% does not work? This must’ve been what Thomas Edison felt like when he created the light bulb, I thought to myself. I was invigorated by my own thinking – but I needed more. I needed evidence.

And then as if God was listening to the inner workings of my mind, the most important tweet of all time fell into my lap.

While dealing with a disgruntled customer (shocker) on Twitter, Brielle tweeted out the following:

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Why the hell would Brielle have access to a random company’s order list unless her and her mother own it. I felt satisfied, I felt vindicated, I felt right – which is new for me.

So naturally, I felt like sharing this useless piece of information that has consumed most of my free time these past few months. You’re welcome.

  1. Carol March 30, 2017 at 10:56 am


  2. Alexandra March 30, 2017 at 12:18 pm

    Being the loyal fan that I am, I bought it. It made me throw up and gave me horrible diarrhea for 24 hours!!! I literally can’t even watch the Snapchat and Instagram stories anymore it’s such bs!!

  3. Kelley March 30, 2017 at 1:27 pm

    Buttt do you think Brielle has a login to the online store just so she can maybe see how much commission she is getting from how many of her codes are being used???? idk

  4. KG March 30, 2017 at 6:13 pm

    Claudia! I saw your snap and was SO excited to run over to read this post. Yes, I completely agree it’s becoming SO annoying. She was live yesterday pushing it down folks throat, again. BUT I expect more from your reporting. Why does it suck 100%? Did you try it? Did you determine that it was worthless? I need to know more, but your point about ownership is a SUPER strong one. That would make so much sense!

  5. Harmony, Momma To Go March 30, 2017 at 9:44 pm

    THIS is hilarious and seeemingly consistent w the crazy biermanns I do love their show though

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