From The Expert: Snacks

I may not know how to do Algebra, Calculus or Geometry – but if there is one thing I know how to do, it’s eat. And the art of eating is something I take very seriously.

You’ve got your standard cookies and crackers but I am about to introduce to you (in no particular order) the 5 best snacks in the world, undisputed.

And away we go:


OK, on my quest to find this great photo of the Ruffles I accidentally came across the calorie count in a standard serving size so please kill me. This flavor, although often difficult to find, is sofa king good. If you gave me 5 minutes with a family size bag, I would have little to no problem finishing it by myself. 


Now I don’t have a proper name or brand for these cookies but all I know is that they are sold in big grocery stores in Florida. I believe they are technically sugar cookies but they definitely have crack in them or something because if I am within 25 miles of these cookies, I have to have themIt’s a very dangerous addiction.


Sia’s song ‘The Greatest’ is undoubtedly about the microwavable Kraft Mac n’ Cheese. Not only is it idiot proof with it’s 3.5 minute prep, but it is probably the best Mac n’ Cheese in the entire world. Who needs a fancy 5 Cheese Macaroni from Ruth’s Chris Steak House when your local grocery store has this gourmet item for under 5 dollars. 


I’m not sure if this cake technically qualifies as a snack, but anything can be a snack if you put your mind to it. Now, I can’t speak from experience, but I imagine the feeling that I get when I eat this cake is similar to the feeling others get when they shoot heroin. THIS 👏🏼 CAKE 👏🏼 IS 👏🏼 SO 👏🏼 SOFT👏🏼  AND 👏🏼 DE 👏🏼 LIC 👏🏼 IOUS.


And last, but certainly not least, my one true love: The Chipwich. Two perfectly baked chocolate chip cookies, sandwiched around creamy vanilla ice cream, all covered in frozen chocolate chips. If everyone around the world just sat down and ate a Chipwich together, we would achieve world peace. Nobody who just ate a Chipwich wants to become a terrorist!

  1. Tish November 24, 2016 at 10:47 pm

    Those are Lofthouse brand cookies and I may or may not have singlehandedly eaten an entire carton that one time…

  2. JessConnor December 8, 2016 at 3:06 pm

    There is no doubt that microwavable mac n’ cheese is gawd sent but there is no way that it’s idiot proof. Do you know how many kids set off fire alarms in my dorm because they forgot to add water before microwaving??? answer: one too many.

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