Hi guys. So many angering things are happening around the world that I have to take to the Internet to talk about it – cause that’s what people do right?
First of all, KENDALL JENNER QUIT INSTAGRAM. Yup.
Does anyone know why? Kendall is so illusive sometimes I can’t even.
And then on top of that, rumors are swirling that Khloe Kardashian and Tristan Thompson have broken up! I totally thought this was it for Khloe. From living in a crack den, to being by Lamar’s death bed – she deserves true love!
AND AS IF IT COULDN’T GET ANY WORSE, Bella Hadid and The Weeknd broke up! And the media isn’t giving it nearly as much attention as it should! This is historic!
But what I’m more worried about is the Instagram account @abelxbella? That bitch has 19,000 followers! What will they all do now?
And finally, Kim Kardashian is still MIA with no signs of life. Some intern is running her app and I can totally see through it! It’s not the real Kim and I don’t know how much longer I can stomach her absence.